First sermon for Homiletics Class

            Here is my first sermon for my homiletics [teach me to preach] class. I’m glad to report it was well received. Father Serge, my professor, doesn’t require citations but I was inspired by online sources that led me to this quote from Blessed Mother Teresa “God doesn’t ask that we succeed in everything, but that we are faithful. However beautiful our work may be, let us not become attached to it. Always remain prepared to give it up, without losing your peace.”
           Follwoing is the text for my sermon, which I am required to proclaim before I preach. Proclamation has special meaning to Father Serge. He believes that our sacred texts hold the word of God and since Jesus is the Living Word of God, it somehow holds Jesus, too. In addition, we perform a sacramental act when we speak God’s words; we need to make them come alive. It is an invitation for Jesus’ real presence as we remember that when two or three are gathered in his name, he will be with us. Father Serge should teach “Proclamation” classes for the whole church!  Sunday mornings would be livelier.

A reading from the letter by Paul to the community at Corinth  2 Corinthians 6.1-10

          As we work together with Jesus, we urge you also not to accept the grace of God in vain. For he says, ‘At an acceptable time I have listened to you, and on a day of salvation I have helped you.’
See, now is the acceptable time; see, now is the day of salvation!
We are putting no obstacle in anyone’s way, so that no fault may be found with our ministry, but as servants of God, we have commended ourselves in every way: through great endurance, in afflictions, hardships, calamities, beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless nights, hunger;
by purity, knowledge, patience, kindness, holiness of spirit, genuine love,
truthful speech, and the power of God;
with the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and for the left;
in honor and dishonor, in ill repute and good repute.
We are treated as impostors, and yet are true; as unknown, and yet are well known; as dying, and see—we are alive; as punished, and yet not killed; as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, and yet possessing everything.

         “Faithfulness, not success” reads the plaque in my spiritual director’s office.
          Not long ago while working with Donna, the treasurer in my parish, I offended her. Donna was brave enough to tell me I had hurt her feelings. I apologized and acknowledged that I done just that. At the end of our conversation, Donna said that I apologized rather well. I confessed that this wasn’t the first time I had occasion to apologize and with all the experience I had, I was glad to learn that I was acquiring some skill. Through our conversation, we experienced the grace of God’s love and became even closer friends. That was the acceptable time; that was a day of salvation!
            On another occasion, I was serving as the senior warden of our vestry. In my tradition, this is the chair of the church’s governing lay board. The vestry was dealing with sensitive personnel issues and we had a group agreement of confidentially; what’s said in the executive sessions stays in the executive sessions. One of our members broke the group agreement of confidentially. I discussed this openly and directly with her during one of the meetings. This was not successful. I hurt her and I think I damaged the group even as I was trying to strengthen our commitment to each other and to the work God had given us to do. This member left the community. No effort of my part has yet created reconciliation between us. A time for me of dishonor and ill repute.
              “Faithfulness, not success.” Oh, but reconciliation is so very sweet! It is as refreshing as the morning dew. I know you can hear the regret that I still have for my failure.
          Paul calls us to faithfulness in our work as God’s servants. Paul begs us to show we possess worthwhile qualities—the qualities of endurance, knowledge, patience, kindness, and genuine love—all through the power of God. These are the core qualities of faithfulness.
            “Faithfulness, not success.” Whether we succeed or fail on a particular task is often out of our control. That’s why, no matter how much we succeed, there is ultimately no peace in it. It’s never quite enough. In fact, often with great success we are less peaceful and less faithful. We come to rely on our success so much that we live in fear of failure and loosing the trappings of success. And what about the times when we can’t see success; when we don’t even know what success might be under the difficulties we face?
             On the other hand, our faithfulness is under our control. No matter what happens in this world – who becomes Governor of California, whether or not I have a job, if I lose my savings, if I'm never ordained as a priest, if no community ever calls me to be their priest, – I can still pray to remain faithful. That is always under my control.
             We  know what it means to be faithful. Paul tells us as servants of God, we can give ourselves in every way to purity, knowledge, patience, kindness, and holiness of spirit, genuine love, truthful speech, and the power of God; with the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and for the left.
            And this is what God asks. Faithfulness and not success. This is the ultimate peace in life; the peace that passes understanding. When we are immersed in tears, yet always filled with deep joy; when we are poor, yet making many rich; when we have nothing, and yet have it all. This is what we were made to do. Alleluia!

Who am I now? Homesick for myself? September 2010 thoughts

        My summer was good and colored by the grief of saying good-bye to my old self and adopting or transforming into a new identity. This ordination track has been filled with peaks and valleys, joys and sorrows, transformation and concentration of essence. So it is just like life itself. Somehow, when I am seeking the Holy I still cling to the idea it will be set aside from life’s petty problems, which, of course, is baloney-both the setting aside and the pettiness of life’s problems. Since I have been working toward the goal of ordination, I have seen my old life recede and a new life come to the fore. With my time at St. John’s as an intern last academic year and my leaving in August for school, the shift has been sharper.
      Once at a personal growth seminar, the leader posed the scenario of ‘what would be the first things you would do if plunked down with a small nest egg in an English speaking city unknown to you?’ My first thought was I would get business cards printed and then find a place to sleep and work. My work as a tax consultant and financial advisor has been central to my identity. For 35 years, I’ve had a desk filled with the tools of my trade.
       Two years ago, I transferred the ownership of the bulk of my practice to my daughter, Susan. Yet the transfer of the business felt like it was paperwork primarily and the clients and I continued to work together without change. Now with me in Berkeley, Susan will move the offices around and I will no longer have my own office. I cleaned out my desk in August. It was very difficult. I am still involved in the business, working remotely from Berkeley, still talking with clients. However, at a distance, and not as my primary focus.
          I wonder if it is harder to seek ordination when the life before was good and well developed. I have always loved my work even though, of course, it is sometimes hard and problematic as work often is. Why this seeking?
           My life is/was good—a partner who loves me and whom I love, two children who are finding their own ways as adults, a dog of perfection to remind me of God’s love for creation—myself included, work that was of service, personally satisfying and met my economic needs, a faith community that was nourishing me and hopefully I was nourishing them. With a life so rich and satisfying, why was I called to spend so much money and so much time changing everything? Grief and fear kissed each other, and caught me in their embrace.
          I’ve thought about the decision to continue on this track and what the decision means to my intimate family. In some ways, I have felt comfortable making major decisions since they would only really affect me. (Oh foolish me, as if any decisions in my life only affect me.) The results of this decision are becoming clearer. I will be of less financial assistance to my children and to the organizations I have supported. My partner, Kathleen, will work several years longer and have a less secure retirement. I will not do many things that had been part of my vision of my own retirement like learning to paint, traveling, and continuing to live in my current home. Kathleen and I will spend extended time away from each other. And for what? Will my work as a priest be worth it?
       What was I thinking? On the other hand, perhaps this was one of the times I wasn’t thinking. That’s happened before.
        Taking all these thoughts, fears, and concerns to God has helped tremendously. I had a chance to preach at Resurrection in Eugene in August and found that I preached what I needed to hear. I heard from God that sometimes I have more faith in my fears than in my relationship with her. I heard from the Holy Spirit that I wasn’t that person, that tax consultant any longer and part of the change was the fact that I’m older now, the fire in the belly burns for different reasons. All of us go through times of loss of identity with job changes, illness, divorce, death, and aging. It’s just hit me hard because I haven’t had much practice in big shifts that I sought out.
        With time in prayer and in conversation with Kathleen, I came to Berkeley in good shape. Now with some time in Berkeley, I’m seeing the arc of the pieces of my identity that are staying with me, which, of course are the major and central pieces of who I am. I’m also now ready to set aside several identity pieces that no longer fit. Much of what I was feeling grief about is still a part of me but in a new configuration. I stayed present to the process I’ve been experiencing and I think I’ve found a newly arranged set of skills to handle this type of grieving process.
         And I have a new desk in Berkeley full of office supplies and school tools and new/old friends to be my colleagues, so I am feeling more grounded.

My Preaching Class

Our class is held in the chapel at the Dominican School of Philosophy and Theology so we understand that there is no "pretend" preaching. My professor, Father Serge Propst, self describes as dyslexic and somewhat autistic, a fly fisher, and a lover of the church and St. John Chrysostom, Archbishop of Constantinople. Chrysostom, an Early Church Father, is known for his eloquence in preaching and public speaking, his denunciation of abuse of authority by both ecclesiastical and political leaders, the Divine Liturgy attributed to him, and his ascetic sensibilities. He was given the Greek surname chrysostomos, meaning "golden mouthed", rendered in English as Chrysostom.

My classmates are seven young men, three in robes, and all about my son, Sean's age.  And me.  I was a little intimidated until I realized that most of their future congregations are going to be women just like me.

Here are some of my notes from the first class that outline Father Serge's understanding of preaching.  As a Dominican priest, he has spent his professional life preaching through out the world, including working with Mother Teresa in Calcutta. 

Preaching is not public speaking; the focus is on Jesus, with the goal to create an encounter with Jesus in the proclamation of the sacred text. The preacher and the listener are transfigured by the embrace of love/grace. This s a personal and public witness on one’s faith—intimate revelation of one’s faith, vulnerable to acceptance or rejection. Your life is an example of your preaching and your personal transformation through the Word. After the third week of class we will preach every week!

Jesus is there--dynamic, active, the event, the encounter. Preaching speaks from heart to heart. You must preach what you are devoted to, the goal is touching hearts. It is meaning making, experienced, embodied and shared. St. John defines salvation as knowing Jesus, constant interaction. We must mix it up with Jesus, with prayer as the Cuisinart, to make salsa. Preaching is an invitation to prayer in this way.

Faith is strengthened when it is given to others. Preaching is a salvific act, transformative, an embrace of love.

Prayer is a dialogue with Jesus.  Preaching is a dialogue with each other about the meaning.  It should always be followed by celebration, in blessing, sharing food, and experiencing joy.

In Preparation: must feel the need of the congregation in ourselves, see our own capacity for sin, for need, then we must encounter the text, watch for the possibility of transformation, catalyst—how—where.  When the text is proclaimed the person and the Holy Spirit remember together, the Holy Spirit remembers with us, in the eternal now.

In the Liturgy, it is the primacy of meaning, not the primacy of performance. Father Serge definition of paganism is emphasis on doing the rite correctly regardless of meaning, that this is central to pagan practice. Preaching is where the grace of the text meets the need in the person, the need in the congregation. This is grace encountering a concrete need. We should never separate the preaching from the text.

Keep a sharp eye on the agenda-who’s is it. Do not suppress the meaning of the text. Avoid baldly or badly proclaiming the text. Do not fail to connect the grace with the need, remember we may need to awaken ourselves to the need, i.e. bigotry, Make it bread fresh from the oven. Do not give God’s people stale left overs. When you do,  you are neglecting the people you are preaching to, including yourself.

So far this class has been wonderful. Father Serge first wanted us to work on our 'proclamation' skills.  He sees this as the first step in preaching--to be able to read the text effectively to the congregation.  So he assigned each of us three texts: a sort children's book Ollie the Eel, the poem by Shelley, Ozymandias,  and part of a sermon by St. John Chrysostom.  We then presented then to the class.  It was fun and, of course, we were all nervous.  I will preach my first sermon to the class on Tuesday, 10-12-10.  I'll post a copy and let you know what feedback I receive.

Ember Days

Ember Days, 2010-2011


Canon III.8.5 (i) states, "Each Postulant or Candidate for ordination to the Priesthood shall communicate with the Bishop in person or by letter, four times a year, in the Ember Weeks, reflecting on the Candidate's academic experience and personal and spiritual development.” The Canons are the body of laws and regulations made by or adopted by the Episcopal Church for governance of the organization and its members.

Four times a year I send our Bishop a brief update on how I am doing on the journey. So we might ask:

What are Ember Days? Here’s what I’ve gathered from several places on the internet.

      This ancient celebration may have roots in pre-Christian celebrations of sowing, growing, and harvesting crops. Some scholars point to specific Celtic origins, linked to the Celtic custom of observing various festivals at three-month intervals: Imbolc, Beltane, Lughnasadh, and Samhain. These festivals we see today as Candlemas and St. Brigit’s Day for Imbolc, May Day for Beltane, state fairs celebrating the harvest in August for Lughnasadh, and Halloween for Samhain. Some point to Roman festivals, where we implored the gods to bless food production-what can be more basic than food: one in summer for harvest, one in autumn for the vintage, and one in winter for the coming planting of seeds. By the second century, Christians in Rome had baptized these observances and sometime (probably in the third century) a balancing fourth was added for spring. When the church calendar was first developing, the major feasts were Easter, Pentecost, and Ember Days. We didn’t yet celebrate Christmas or Advent, and Lent was just emerging.

      By the fifth century, Ember Saturdays became the quarterly dates for the ordination of deacons and priests. The Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays became days of fasting and supplication not just for the earth, but also for the Church, for its ministers and ministry. They became a time to pray for the Church.

      As the church calendar continued to develop Ember Days receded as Advent, All Saints, and Trinity Sunday, joined Advent and Lent as major hubs of the church’s year.

      I think Ember Days historically represented a special ascetical effort at the beginning of each of the four seasons. This effort took the form especially of the triad already recommended in the Old Testament: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving. At the same time, the days were days of thanksgiving for the various seasonal harvests; from the fifth century on they also served for the preparation and conferral of holy orders. In our own times, they have been revitalized to some extent, and in some countries, as days of prayer for vocations to the priesthood and religious life.

      When are Ember Days? In the Episcopal Church the Ember Days are the Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday after the First Sunday in Lent, after the Day of Pentecost, after Holy Cross Day (September 14), and after the Feast of St. Lucy (December 13).

The Ember Days this fall and next spring are:

2010 September 15, 17, and 18 (the Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday after Holy Cross Day)

2010 December 15, 17, and 18 (the Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday after December 13)

2011 March 16, 18, 19 (the Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday after the First Sunday in Lent)

2011 June 15, 17, 18 (the Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday after Pentecost)